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The Wanting Comes In Waves

All Sam/Dean, All The Time

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A Little Slice of Something

I'm really conflicted about this last episode which I just re-watched this week.
On one hand,

The interactions between the boys were lovely.  All the caring and sharing and closeness was great, they looked so natural, like they're a couple that has made up and is back together.  So their peacefulness together didn't make much sense at all given what happened in last week's blow-up episode.  (Guess I know what I'll be writing next.)  So I feel gypped that we didn't get to see that actual conversation when no one was under supernatural influence. Are we to guess that Sam just never said anything because he thought Dean was right about everything he was yelling?  How would he have just gotten over hearing that Benny was more of a brother to Dean than he's ever been?

But on the other hand, as much as I am tired of the angel storyline and wish they'd all just go away so we could find out more about the demons, I have a bunch of angel related speculation and questions (and gripes).

So let me get this straight: Cas knew he wasn't going to try and leave Purgatory with Dean, but instead of telling Dean that when Dean first found him again, he stayed with Benny and Dean endangering them during their search for the portal.  (remember the whole, no it's not safe the Leviathan are attracted to the angel thing?).  Why would Cas have unnecessarily endangered Dean like that?
No wonder Dean wanted to forget and make a new memory to replace it, not only was Dean very conflicted about Cas when they went in to Purgatory, Cas' actions there; abandoning Dean immediately; then staying with him when found even though it makes it more dangerous for Dean; not being honest about his intentions (oh no, not that again); and then almost making Dean miss the portal being open (at the end there Dean was yelling about it closing) are all things Dean could have wanted to forget.  Easier just to feel guilty instead of betrayed once again.  

The whole false memory thing just comes off as extra drama for no really good reason.  It doesn't make sense (that's season 8 it seems) because as much as Dean blames himself for stuff, we've never seen him do something like that to himself.  The only thing that makes sense is that Cas gets it that he had penance to pay and Purgatory was the place to do it.  I agree, he was absolutely right to feel like he belonged in Purgatory.  Whatever force keeps resurrecting Cas (God?) apparently thought so too, otherwise he would have popped right back out instead of being stuck in there.  

As bored as I am with the whole angels and Heaven storyline, I still have to try and figure this out.  I think the angels that pulled Cas out are not doing it at the behest of God, They've got their own agenda to be fighting their way in to Purgatory, even more angels died (how many are there left? No archangels apparently as Kevin sure needed one as his finger was being chopped off).  My guess is that there is another tablet that tells humans how to deal with angels (just like there was one for Leviathan and Demons). And the angels wouldn't want that, especially if they want to make the whole Apocalypse thing happen again.  Which I think they do, why else would Naomi be tasking Cas to spy on Sam and Dean.  Sure easier to use the vessels that already exist than wait around to make new ones. 

All during seasons 4 and 6, Cas was a spy of one kind or another, so this is nothing new.  Except maybe this time Sam and Dean will actually figure it out in time.  Dean is already very suspicious of Cas' return with no memory which is a good thing.

The effects when Cas went super-angel were hilarious and actually made me laugh, wish they'd stuck with the original ones which were pretty cool.  (welcome to uncanny valley y'all). Unless they're meant to indicate that Cas is different now, perhaps even a newly appointed archangel for Kevin.  Which would be nice because he sure needs one.

I'm hoping that since Dean's memory was faulty and in such a crucial way, that this bodes well for the theory that Sam's hyper-bright memories of Amelia and Riot might also be fantasy mixed up with a touch of reality and what he really needed but couldn't get to survive the loss of Dean. 

Found it interesting that Crowley's place was not angel-proofed.  Like he thinks it is so chaotic in Heaven that he doesn't have to worry about the angels interfering like they used to. Guess he was wrong. 

Only two more episodes left this year!

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So let me get this straight: Cas knew he wasn't going to try and leave Purgatory with Dean, but instead of telling Dean that when Dean first found him again, he stayed with Benny and Dean endangering them during their search for the portal. (remember the whole, no it's not safe the Leviathan are attracted to the angel thing?). Why would Cas have unnecessarily endangered Dean like that?

Hm, that's one interpretation. It makes me ask the counter-question: given Dean himself, what we know about his tendency to ignore his own safety for someone else's sake, how he responded when he found Castiel in Purgatory and was told that Castiel had been staying away because he was a beacon for Leviathan; do you think that Dean would have actually said, oh, all right then, let Castiel stay, and walked out the portal by himself? Or is he more likely to lose his own chance to cross, maybe even get killed, trying to persuade Castiel to come with him, and tracking him down again if he leaves? In 802 (around the 25 minute mark), Castiel tries to tell Dean no - he tells him why he left, that it's too dangerous to be around him, that Dean has to leave him, and Dean says, *very* emphatically, "Let me lay it out for you. I'm not leaving here without you. Understand?"

I actually think that the only way to get Dean out of the portal was to do what Castiel did - help him get there, let him think Castiel was going right to the last minute, and then pull back when Dean was already inside and it was too late for him to back out. Dean didn't nearly lose the crossing - he was inside, trying to pull Castiel in before it closed, and the portal itself sucked Dean away almost as soon as Castiel got his feet under him and shook loose Dean's grip.

The false memory thing is interesting in an episode where we have angels manipulating memory, even if it's just thematically linked rather than being a clue. And it strikes me as very Dean to interpret it as his own fault (an easy situation to remember incorrectly, with all the sound and chaos), but Castiel rectified that the moment he knew that was the situation.

Man, I'll be so bummed if Amelia isn't real.

Edited at 2012-11-24 01:19 am (UTC)

That conversation in 8.02 was what I was thinking of. Given how well Cas supposedly knows Dean, why wouldn't he have really explained himself and said goodbye right then and there instead of giving in and sticking with Dean and Benny? But you might be right that Cas leading him to the portal was the only way to actually get Dean to leave him behind in Purgatory. But a juicy conversation in purgatory about Cas' guilt for everything he did and wanting to stay and atone for it would have been lovely. Especially given how unresolved and tentative their friendship was going into Purgatory.

Dean said something about it's closing, hurry, and stepped back away from the portal towards Cas,and it looked like it was sealing up while he was trying to reach back for Cas, that's what I was referring to.

The false memory thing is interesting isn't it? Especially when we know how fond the angels are of manipulating humans. I was glad that Cas noticed that Dean was mis-remembering for whatever reason and fixed it for him. Hope it was actually the true memory that he showed Dean, who really knows right?

I also hope that Amelia is real, but I kinda am wishing for something dramatic like she is actually an angel, then Sam will have the matched set for when Dean is away in another dimension.

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