?

Log in

No account? Create an account
hidden

smalltrolven

The Wanting Comes In Waves

All Sam/Dean, All The Time


Previous Entry Share Next Entry
Ruby Dying
smalltrolven

Fic: Seeing All of You (Ruby/Anna NC-17)

Title: Seeing All of You
Author: smalltrolven
Artist: elliemurasaki
Pairings: Ruby/Anna, canon Anna/Dean, implied Sam/Dean
Genre: slightly AU, mostly canon based
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 7,200
Warnings: Set during season 4, canon character death.

Summary: Ruby and Anna make a connection during the events of 4.09 "I Know What You Did Last Summer", something Ruby never forgets even as she carries out The Plan.

Author Notes: Written for the genteensybang.  Big huge thanks to my wonderful beta, stella_lost, mwah!  This counts as my fic for the Ruby/Anna space on my spnpairingbingo card.

Go check out the art masterpost right here. Thanks so much Ellie!

You can also read this over on AO3.
rubys plan border
“You know, I can see you, all of you in there.” Anna says, in a distracted wondering voice.

“What are you talking about?” Ruby asks, looking askance at this pitiful huddling human girl sitting next to her on the dilapidated couch.

“All of the you’s in there, there are a lot of you.” Anna answers meekly, hoping that conversing with this thing won’t damn her forever.

“I have no idea what you mean, I’m just me, you can call me Ruby.” Ruby says, looking into the girl’s impossibly wide and beautiful eyes.

Anna’s eyes go even wider when she sees Ruby looking back at her, “It’s like they are standing in order behind you, first I see a large black woman in a maid’s outfit, then a beautiful tall brunette white woman, then a skinny girl with long-blond hair, and last I see a small red-haired woman dressed in clothes that look like they’re from the 1400’s.  What are you?”

Ruby can only stare, this girl, this human, has seen all of the bodies she’s inhabited since her original human incarnation, how is that possible?  Sam and Dean had said she was the one somehow listening to angels, but she’s never encountered anyone that could do this.  Could see her, the real her. “I’m just a demon, but what the hell are you?  No human should be able to do that.” Ruby demands.

“Probably shouldn’t be able to listen to angels either.  I have no idea, I’m sorry I really don’t.” Anna shrinks back further into her corner of the couch, fearful of this demon who looks like so many women all at once, her sudden anger unsettling and scary.

“Is there anything else?” Ruby asks tersely.

Taking a chance that she really is entertaining more questions, Anna ventures, “You used to be human right?  That last woman, the one from the 1400’s, was that the original you?  She looks so scared.”

“I was.  Yeah, it wasn’t a real good time to be a witch.”  Ruby grins with a somewhat rueful smile.

“Were you hunted down like during the witch burnings or something?” Anna asks, pursuing this interesting idea, she’s talking to someone that lived that long ago! It takes her mind off all the other worries that she can’t let herself think about right now.

“Something like that, it wasn’t much fun, believe me.” Ruby answers, not wanting to elaborate, sure that Anna couldn’t take hearing the details right now anyways.

“Who are the other women then?”

“Different bodies I’ve possessed while I’ve been up here.” Ruby says nonchalantly, even though she knows Anna has no idea what that really means.

“Up here?”  Anna’s not giving up, this is too interesting to let up on questioning while Ruby’s still answering.

“Up here as in not down in Hell.  We’re just basically smoke up here on this plane.”

“So you possess humans to do what exactly?”  Anna asks, not truly wanting to know the answer, Ruby is a demon after all, but who knows what that really means.  Some of the stuff the angels had been saying sounded pretty awful, and not what she had expected.

Ruby thinks back on everything she’s done in this current body, fighting and running, cutting her arms so Sam could drink.  Then reluctantly the memories of Sam’s hands and lips and teeth, his hard cock practically tearing this tiny body apart.  Only that one time, but she’ll never forget it.  Every time she’s near him she can hardly think straight, but she knows that now that Dean’s back, she can’t push it.  Otherwise she’ll lose him completely, and she needs Sam for The Plan to actually work.

She decides to sugar-coat the answer, leaving out all the gory details that Anna doesn’t really need to know, “Yeah, I possess a human body to get around, do stuff, talk to people.”

“Are they awake in there when you’re in them too?” Anna asks, big eyes widening impossibly as she considers the awful ramifications of that thought.

“Sometimes, usually.  This one was a girl that was dying in a coma.  Sam insisted.” Ruby gestures with her hand, indicating her current body.

Anna follows Ruby’s moving hand and looks intently at her body, noticing how curvy she is, but she’s curious about Sam too, “Insisted why?”

“Long story, but he didn’t want to deal with me if I was possessing someone that was still alive and in here.  He, uh, was possessed by another demon before and knows what it’s like.  He needed me when Dean was gone in Hell, and I had to meet him halfway you know?”

“That’s good, I bet you’re a good friend to him.”

“I guess you could say that.  Dean wouldn’t agree though, he hates me.”

“Why?  Just because you’re a demon?”

“Mostly that, he’s pretty racist. But let’s just say he’s awfully jealous for a big brother.”

“Oh. Ohhhh. Really?” Anna’s eyes go comically wide as she realizes what Ruby’s saying.

“Uh huh really.  I know it’s weird, but it’s their thing, they’ve had a bizarre life. We don’t talk about it, they sure as hell don’t.  So it’d be cool if you could keep it to yourself that you know. Okay?”  Ruby winks conspiratorially.

Anna sees the wink and smiles back tentatively, “Sure, I won’t say a thing.  Ruby, why are you helping since you’re a demon?”

“Well, it’s a little complicated.  Let’s just say I still remember being human, and I want to help.  Sam and Dean are involved in something really important here.”

“Is it really the Apocalypse? That’s what the angels were saying.” Anna asks in a near whisper.

“Yeah, the Apocalypse is definitely nigh as they say.  It doesn’t get much bigger than that, does it? I figure they need all the help they can get.”

“Do you think they can do it? Can two just plain human men stop something like that, isn’t it like angels and demons and all?”

“They’re special cases let’s just say, I think they have a chance, so I’m sticking around to see it through.”

“I’m glad they have you. Is that why you brought me here? You’re helping them by hiding me here?”

“Yeah, they’ll be here in a while, I popped out while you were sleeping and told them where we were, that was the maid that you saw first. I possessed her in the motel they’re staying at to tell them.”

“Who were the others?”

“Just some women that I wore for a while, one of them for a long time that was the blond.  She felt real good until I got kicked out by someone much bigger than myself.  When I came back I decided to go brunette for a while.”

“It looks good on you.  But you were a redhead like me originally?”

“Yeah, I was.  One of the things that got me in trouble.  Back then, if you were a red head then you were suspected of being a witch.  I figured they already thought I was, I might as well just go for it.  I was a good one too.  I like your red hair better though, it’s a nicer shade than mine ever was.”  Ruby reaches out and strokes it gently.

Anna turns into her hand a little, relishing the gentle touch, Ruby’s not what she expected a demon to be, “I’m really scared Ruby.” She confesses.

“I know Anna, I wish I could help.” Ruby doesn’t know why she feels drawn to this girl, or where this strong protective impulse is coming from, but she pulls her in close, almost onto her lap, wrapping her up tightly in her arms.

At first Anna holds herself tight, not sure what Ruby is doing, but Ruby keeps stroking her hair and she incrementally relaxes until she’s got her head cradled on Ruby’s generous chest.  Anna lets go of the terror she’s just experienced during her encounter at the church with Sam and Dean and that guy who was apparently a bad kind of demon.  She tries not to focus on how worried she is about her parents, and just breathes in Ruby.  She smells something spicy, cloves maybe, a little sweat, on top of it all something that reminds her of sulfur, but nothing overpowering.  Anna snuggles in closer, putting her legs over Ruby’s so she’s now pretty much in her lap.  Then she slowly sneaks her own arms around Ruby and closes her eyes with a small sigh.

Ruby rolls her eyes when she hears the sigh.  This girl is way too cute, she feels like she’s taking care of a puppy or something, it’s been too long since she’s had to do the caring human shtick.  Luckily tricking Sam didn’t require too much of that since he was so out of it. Ruby leans her head closer to Anna’s and buries her nose in all that beautiful red hair.  She smells so clean, some kind of citrus maybe, whatever they were washing her with at the mental hospital.

Feeling Ruby smelling her triggers something in Anna, the hesitation at exploring her attraction to this woman, who’s also a demon, just kind of disappears.  Being scented like that is some base pre-human instinct that is too hard to ignore.  And she needs something, comfort in this scary situation, distraction from thinking about the worst case scenario.  So she lets herself do what she’s wanted to do since she first saw Ruby, saw all of the different women in there.  Anna begins to move her hands on Ruby’s lower back.  Gently roaming back and forth until her shirt comes loose.  They both gasp quietly when Anna‘s hand makes contact with Ruby’s skin.  She’s so soft and tender here, Anna’s hands go lower down towards the curve of Ruby’s ass.  Which yes, she of course had noticed, she’s not blind, and whatever body Ruby’s riding has a pretty perfect ass which she thinks will nicely fill her hands.  She murmurs into Ruby’s collarbone, breath ghosting the skin until it prickles, “this okay?”

Ruby’s answer is a soft groan, she’s gotten so little touch lately, nothing extra from Sam when he drinks from her.  And there’s no one for her, not any more, not for a long time.  So she decides that yes, she can have a little something here, it won’t hurt anything.  Won’t affect The Plan which is the whole reason she’s here.
Ruby begins moving her hands on Anna’s back and deftly unsnaps her bra.  She can’t wait to see these human breasts in person, from what she’d noticed before they looked pretty spectacular.  She laughs quietly to herself as Anna squirms in her arms, trying to get out of her blouse and bra. “Hold on, let me.” She commands, and Anna stops instantly, looking up at her with wide eyes.  Ruby pulls the top up from the bottom hem and snags Anna’s bra at the same time, and all of a sudden there she is, a half-naked red-head in her lap.

“You’re so beautiful Anna, just perfect.” Ruby whispers as she kisses her way down Anna’s neck to encircle one of her large red-brown nipples with her mouth.  She suckles and nips and licks until Anna is writhing nonstop.

“Oh god, Ruby, feels so good.” Anna isn’t going to let herself feel ashamed for speaking her pleasure aloud.  She hasn’t been touched like this, like she’s a piece of exquisite priceless art, well, ever.  There have been just a couple of lovers, but no one like Ruby.  “Ruby let me.”  Anna is insistent, she wants Ruby’s shirt and bra off too.

Ruby reluctantly stops worshipping Anna’s breast and assists in removing her own shirt and bra.  They embrace, skin to skin now, their naked torsos interlocking perfectly as if made for each other. Rubbing together a little so that their nipples provide friction for the other’s pleasure is a new delight.  Anna pulls Ruby’s face up so that they can finally kiss, soft lips caressing, tongues exploring until they pull back from each other a little stunned and a little breathless.

“Anna, can I?” Ruby asks, kind of hating how breathless she sounds, her hand on the top button of Anna’s pants.

Anna can’t speak, she’s so turned on by all the touching and Ruby’s kisses so she manages to nod her assent.

Ruby grins a little lopsidedly, this girl is so adorable, and makes quick work of opening her pants and maneuvering her hand inside to feel if Anna’s as wet as she hopes she is.  Soaked.  Maybe as much as she is herself, this is going to be good.  Ruby hasn’t had a girl yet while in this body.  And this one seems so different, like there’s more to Anna than she can perceive.  But right now Anna’s a wriggling lap-full of woman that she needs to take care of in all the right ways.

“Oh yes, like that, just like that Ruby.” Anna pushes up onto the single finger Ruby is using on her, gripping it with the walls of her cunt, wishing it was more as she floods even wetter.  “More Ruby please.” Anna begs.  Ruby smiles down at her, a hot, lust-filled smile and adds one finger and then another when Anna opens up further to accommodate her fingers.

“God Ruby, so good, don’t stop. Please.” The pressure and slick glide is so good, she’s feeling spread open just as far as her jeans will allow.  Then Ruby starts rubbing at Anna’s clit with her other hand.  Anna throws her head back in ecstasy, feeling the softness of Ruby’s breasts pressing into her back.  She leans up and kisses Ruby’s neck and chin.  With a soft moan she feels herself go tight around Ruby’s fingers, arching up pressing into where they’re connected.  And she’s coming hard, even more moisture flooding out.

Ruby pulls her hand out slowly from Anna’s pants, and brings the slick wet fingers to her mouth sucking them in.  “mmm, Anna, you taste so good.”
Anna’s never seen anyone do that in her life and something in her stomach flips, she’s so turned on, even though she just came harder than she has in at least a year.  “Let me do you, please Ruby.”

“How can I say no to that” Ruby answers, chuckling in anticipation, leaning back further and spreading her legs wider.  Anna gets up off her lap unsteadily and sinks to the floor between Ruby’s knees.  She runs both of her hands up Ruby’s thighs, rubbing back and forth, moving closer to the soft inner skin until Ruby’s practically quaking. She rubs over Ruby’s mound through her jeans, tracing all the seams with firm pressure until Ruby’s bucking up into her hand.  Finally Anna decides to stop teasing and undoes the button and zipper, dipping in under Ruby’s panties.  Black, silk, with no lace.  She looks up into Ruby’s darkened eyes, not all black, but getting there and pats the side of Ruby’s ass to get her to rise up so she can slide her jeans down past Ruby’s knees.

 Anna leans in to nuzzle and scent her, she’s natural, not too bushy, but beautiful, just like the rest of her, her smooth muscled thighs are clenching in anticipation as Anna explores all her folds and wrinkles, dipping in to bring up the moisture to make her fingers glide through.  Finally, finally Anna uses her tongue, swirling it through the heat and wet of Ruby, loving the gasps and small sounds of pleasure that she hears.  She teases around Ruby’s clit until she feels her give in beneath her, opening up just that little bit further.  Plunging her fingers into Ruby’s cunt she licks the hood of the clit up and open with the flat of her tongue, vibrating it quickly, alternating with quick little sucks.  Ruby tenses up so fast she almost folds in half as she comes hard.

Anna, her face wet with Ruby’s juices, looks up at her and smiles, licking her lips.  “You taste good too.”

Before Ruby can answer, or even catch her breath they both hear a car’s rumbling engine outside the cabin.  Two doors slam and they hear footsteps approaching.  Anna stands up quickly, fastening her pants and pulling her shirt back on, she grins at seeing Ruby scramble to pull her sopping panties back up and try and stand up with her jeans still down at her knees.  Anna bends down to help her and they’re still kind of wrapped around each other in a very obvious way when the door to the cabin opens.

“Well, guess you were really keeping her safe Ruby, thanks.”  Dean says sarcastically, instantly figuring out the situation, and kind of regretting that they weren’t a few minutes sooner in arriving. A little free show of girl-on-girl would be pretty good right about now.

“Sure Dean, no problem, she was in good hands.” Ruby retorts, not wanting to take any shit from Dean right now, not when she’s still thrumming with the remnants of orgasm and tasting Anna’s juices on her tongue.

“Cut it out you two.” Says Sam, frowning at both of them, concerned that they’re embarrassing Anna, who seems rather flushed. “You okay Anna?” he asks.
Anna goes a shade or two redder, “Uh, yeah, I’m doing good. What took you guys so long?”

“Had to lose someone we thought was following us.” Dean says, winking at Anna, she’s even cuter when she’s embarrassed.

“So have you got a plan to get us out of this mess?” Ruby asks, staring back a little challengingly at Sam’s frowning face as she sees him finally figure out exactly what she and Anna had been up to.

“Well, it’s like this…” Sam explains.
rubys plan border

On the long car ride to meet this friend of Sam and Dean’s, in the backseat, Ruby and Anna hold hands in the dark.  Anna’s so scared, first demons, and now angels!  What else is out there that she doesn’t even know about?  Ruby being here helps though.

Ruby can feel Anna trembling next to her, and finally pulls her over, so her head is on her shoulder.  She says quietly into Anna’s hair, “Just relax, I’ve gotcha.”  Ruby holds Anna tight in her arms and Anna worms her arms around Ruby’s waist to hold her back just as tightly.

“Don’t let go Ruby, I’m scared.”

“I know Anna, it’s going to be alright. I’m not going anywhere.”

Anna looks up at Ruby’s face, seeing her gentle smile makes her feel softly comforted deep inside, like she’s been dipped in warm candle wax.  “Thanks.”

Ruby leans down and kisses Anna gently, not caring about Dean watching in the rear-view mirror.  He’s got Sam, why shouldn’t she have someone, even if it’s just temporary war-time foxhole stuff.  It’s just nice to have someone warm and soft to hold, even if it’s only for a little while.
annas grace border

Finally Anna remembers, she’s an angel.  That’s why she knew how to banish Uriel and Castiel.  And all the memories flood back into her, overwhelming everything that’s just taken place with Ruby.  Her connection with Ruby fades as she focuses in on Dean, because she can sense the tremendous pain he’s struggling with.  He’s vibrating with a deep need, just for someone to understand and acknowledge what he’s gone through and done in Hell. Her natural inclination is to empathy, she wants to help him, and offers him the small grace of her forgiveness, her advice to rely on the others he has in his life, and then her body.  She selfishly wants to feel it one last time, because there’s nothing like it as an angel, and she knows it’s likely her last night as a human.

Ruby sees Anna getting into Dean’s backseat, and punishes herself a little by watching the car rock, the windows steaming up.  She deserves it, she shouldn’t have let herself open up to this girl.  Look who she turned out to be.  It could have ruined everything!  The whole Plan gone up in smoke over her lusting over some stupid girl. Her anger boils over and she stalks back into the barn and wakes Sam up.

“Your man-whore of a brother is screwing Anna right now!” Ruby yells, standing over Sam who’s collapsed into sleep over the books he was reading at the table.

“What?” Sam asks, trying to pull himself out of a sleep that had been troubled by flashes of angels fighting Godzilla while demons rode on the back of several Mothras.

“You heard me, he’s out there right now.  Back seat of your car.  Thought that he was yours Sam.”  Ruby taunts.

Sam shakes his head, trying to wake up, “He is.”

“Well? Aren’t you going to do something about it then?”  Ruby demands, hitting him in the shoulder in her frustration that someone do something because it’s just not fair.

Sam shrugs her off and lowers his head, and says quietly, resigned, “I don’t have the right.  I can’t stop him.”

“But if he’s yours like you said, and you’re his, then why would you let him?” Ruby asks, really not understanding how this works between them, it doesn’t make any sense to her.  Loyalty and steadfastness are things she still remembers from being human, they were important then and now even more so.

“It’s not up to me Ruby!  Dean does all kinds of crazy stuff, I never know what he’s going to do next.  I’m just, well, it’s complicated.”

“Doesn’t seem too complicated Sam, he’s just using you.  Like he’s using Anna right now.  Why the hell should I stick my neck out to help her when she’s doing this?”  Ruby sits down in the chair across from Sam, crossing her arms on the table and laying her head down on them like she’s giving up on figuring out these stupid humans.

“You like her huh Ruby?” Sam asks, his voice dripping with sympathy.

It makes her skin crawl, hearing that Sam feels like he knows even a bit about what she’s feeling, “Yeah, so what if I do.  Did.”

“She just found out she’s an angel, give her a break.  An angel and a demon, c’mon, how’s that ever going to work.” Sam says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

Hearing his infuriating matter-of-fact acceptance pisses her off more than she’s been in ages, she looks up at him with fury in her eyes, “Screw you Sam, and screw your stupid plan!”

“Ruby, stop, you know we need you for this to work.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t feel like it now.” She sits back in the chair and crosses her arms tightly over her chest, holding all her anger inside where she can really use it.

“Hey, I’m not happy about this either, believe me.  I wish Dean could keep it in his pants.  But we don’t work that way.  We never have.”

“Sure Sam, you keep telling yourself that.  But what do you really mean to him, if he can screw her in the backseat of your car?  Didn’t you tell me that you considered that car your home?  Who does something like that to someone they say they love oh so very much?  At least be honest with yourself!”

“I don’t want to talk about this with you.  I really don’t.  It’s between Dean and me. End of story.  Now I know you’re hurt, but we need you to help us here.  We can’t do it without you.”

All she wants to do is leave, right here right now.  Because she’s lost a chance at something with Anna, probably for good, and who knows about Sam since he’s so messed up about his brother.  There’s only The Plan stopping her from taking off this second.  And Anna, if she’s honest with herself.  Even though Ruby’s feeling so hurt about seeing Anna and Dean together, she still feels that urge to protect Anna for some reason.  Maybe it’s just because she’s an angel, who knows, but it’s enough.  Ruby even wonders if Anna has the power to make her somehow not be a demon anymore. She’d do it in a second, go back to being human, especially if it was Anna offering.  Especially if it meant that Anna wanted to be with her. But in the end, it’s her obedience and commitment to The Plan that brings her back to this conversation with Sam.

“Damn right you can’t.  About time you noticed that!” Ruby yells in triumph.

“So you’ll stay?” Sam asks, sounding like he’s realized that he’s going to have to beg her now.

“Yeah, I’ll stick around.  But not for you.   And only if Dean apologizes for screwing my girl.” Ruby says with a determination that surprises her.  Realizing that she needs an apology to keep working with these people is a little humbling, like there’s still an echo of human-ness left deep within that she’s forgotten exists.

“Your girl?”  Sam asks, hoping he’s not going to piss her off even more, but he honestly didn’t realize Ruby had thought of Anna like that.

Ruby just glares in response holding her whole body tense.

“I’ll see what I can do, no promises though, you know how he is.” Sam pleads.

“Yeah, he did real great thanking me for you still being alive to fuck around with.” Ruby rolls her eyes.

Sam makes a face as if he’s just eaten something very sour, “Don’t be crude.”

Ruby just points at herself, “Demon, remember?”

Sam sighs and slowly walks out of the barn towards the Impala where he’s relieved he can see Dean getting out on one side and Anna on the other. He waves to Anna as she passes by him, heading back in.  Who knows what Ruby’s going say to her.

“Dean, can I talk to you for a sec?”

“Can it wait? Kinda finishing up something here Sammy.”

“Yeah, I know, that’s what it’s about.  C’mere.”

“What? You’re not jealous or something are you?  Just because you got stuck with the demon and I got to do the angel?”

Sam sees red, red searing pain at his heart being torn open again.  He’d confessed everything to Dean, all of it.  And still he gets this.  “You really suck at this you know?”

“Suck at what?”

“Never mind, I’m not doing this with you right now.  What’s important is that you need to apologize or she’s leaving.”

“Who? Anna?”

“No, Ruby, she’s pissed that you stole away ‘her girl’ or something.  I don’t know, just go mumble sorry at her, otherwise she’s gonna leave and we won’t be able to help Anna.”

“I’m not doing that, no way.”

“Dean, she’ll leave.  We need her.  I know you don’t like it.  But it’s the truth and you know it.  Besides you saw how they were when we first got to the cabin.  There was something going on there.  And then you pounced tonight.”

“It wasn’t like that Sam.”

“Oh really, what was it like then?”

“Do you want to know or you just being a jealous bitch?”

“Both.”

Dean laughs, “Well, little brother, at least you’re honest some of the time.”

“Screw you Dean.”

“Nah, already been done tonight, thanks though.”

Sam turns and stalks back into the barn, slamming the door hard.   Dean just spins around and looks up at the night sky, wishing that brothers and angels and demons would all take a flying leap and leave him the fuck alone for a while.  But then he relents, knowing that he’s got to help Anna if he can.  Like she just helped him, not the screw in the backseat, but the grace of her forgiveness.  He’s been healed partway now thanks to her, and she’s shown him the light.  So he’ll do it, he’ll apologize to Ruby.  Can’t go worse than the thanks-for-saving-Sam attempt did, right?

Ruby sees Dean re-enter the barn, heading towards where she’s been sitting on one of the uncomfortable old chairs by the central window.  She looks up at him, and his face is held strangely stiff, “Sam said you wanted an apology.  For what Anna and I just…well, I’m sorry.  I didn’t know she was your girl, that wasn’t why we….did that.”

With a derisive laugh, Ruby spits out, “Sam’s right, you do suck at this.”

Dean visibly bristles at that, hearing his brother’s name come out of this demon’s mouth is hard enough, much less taking any of her verbal barbs, “Hey, he said to come apologize and I just did.  It was a misunderstanding okay?  Can we just move on?”

Standing up and getting in his face as much as she can, Ruby answers with an angry shake of her head, “No, I want to hear you explain how you rationalize this being okay, especially what it’s doing to Sam.  I’m not just pissed about Anna.  You’re hurting him and you don’t even care.”

“Like you care about him more than I do? Don’t go there Ruby. Just don’t.”

“Or what Dean?” Ruby crosses her arms tightly and raises one eyebrow.

Dean looks up at the ceiling and then out the window, anywhere but at her, “I learned a lot, down there.”

“What, you threatening to torture me Dean?  Give me a break.”

“Just drop it then.” Dean says shortly, hoping that this is enough, he can’t maintain this conversation much longer.

Ruby sees she’s pushed him as far as she really should and relents, “Fine.”

“But you’ll stay? Help us with Anna’s situation?” Dean asks as strongly as he can without sounding like begging.

“Yeah, I’m staying, I don’t know why, but I am.” Ruby answers, admitting her reluctance seems like it will placate Dean enough so that she can work with him just long enough to make it to the endgame of The Plan.

“Good.” Dean says, sounding like he truly wishes anything but.

Ruby abruptly turns away from Dean and walks over to where Anna is sitting on a very used couch with Sam, “uh Anna, could I talk to you?”

Anna nods, and Sam gets up without a word and walks over near Dean.  As Ruby sits down as close to Anna on the couch as she can get, she sees Sam and Dean start arguing but she can’t hear what they’re saying.  She’s transfixed as she watches them verbally battle.  Sam so incensed, Dean not figuring out how much he’s hurt him.

“They really hurt each other don’t they?” Anna says with a little surprise.

“Yeah, it gets kind of old after a while.” Ruby answers, thinking of all the times she’s eavesdropped on the Winchester brother’s verbal jousts, it’s honestly a little wearing after a while being around such strife.  Even though she knows she’s the cause of it and is thoroughly enjoying the process of slowly tearing them apart.

“Were they like this before Dean went to Hell?”

“No, they really weren’t.”  Ruby says, trying to hide the satisfaction in her voice, that’s the best part of The Plan as far as she’s concerned.  Getting Sam Winchester away from his brother is such a fulfilling delicious perk to her job, she can’t get over how fun it’s been to come between them and turn Sam away from his blind devotion to his brother who’ll never come close to deserving him.

“That’s too bad, I think they really have something special.  This apocalypse thing is rough on us all.”

“Something special, ha, like that’s worth anything.” Ruby scoffs.

Anna puts her hand on Ruby’s knee and squeezes gently, “This about you and me?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Hey, Ruby, I’m sorry, I just.  It’s hard to explain, but Dean needed it, my grace wasn’t enough, and he needs to be able to keep fighting this fight.”

“Dean gets everything he needs apparently.” Ruby says sourly and nods over to where Sam and Dean are kissing like the world’s about to end.  Which, yeah it kinda is, whatever.  She knew Sam wasn’t going to be that easy to crack, Dean’s got a hold on him that’s been working his whole life.

“Good for them.” Anna says, with a wistful note in her voice, like she’s wishing it was her getting kissed by Dean or maybe Ruby, at this point she’s honestly a little confused.

“What about us?” Ruby asks, still sounding so hurt she’s almost ashamed of herself, but she hasn’t felt this kind of deep passion and jealousy in a very long time, she’s entitled alright?

Anna leans over and kisses Ruby softly, then deeply, parting their lips with a sigh, “I’m sorry Ruby, I can’t.”

Ruby turns her head and tries to push away, “Just because I’m a demon?”

“Yes you are.  And I’m an angel.” Anna answers, with a heart-breaking regret and finality.

Ruby bows her head under the sudden weight of this decision, then she raises her eyes to meet Anna’s, “I’m still going to help you.” Ruby retorts stubbornly.

Anna suddenly feels what the gift of a demon’s grace means as it flows through her being, it’s hard and prickly, not an easy meld into her own grace, but she’s glad to have it, “I know.  Thanks.”
annas grace border

Ruby can’t believe that she did that, let herself get tortured by Alastair, out of all the possible demons.  And all over this girl, no, not just a girl, an angel.  Well and Sam and The Plan of course.  But mostly because of the girl.  She could still taste Anna’s last kiss on her lips as Alastair was carving into her.  Just because she had that bit of Anna’s sweetness and the connection they made, she was able to survive and turn the tables into the Godzilla vs. Mothra battle she and Sam had planned on.  Without Anna’s inspiration, Ruby might have just fled and waited out the whole thing on the sidelines.  Hanging around with angels seems like a really bad idea for her own personal survival since she’s a demon but she couldn’t just take off.  Not when Anna was counting on her.  At the time, it seemed like the only thing she could give and not screw up The Plan completely. 
rubys plan border
Ruby was finally asleep, dreaming even, which hardly ever happened Up Top.  And in the quiet forest glade that’s her go-to peaceful place she hears quiet footsteps approaching.  She looks up and there she is, Anna.  The one she’s been missing after all this time.

“Ruby, I’ve been trying to contact you, this was the only way.  Sorry to intrude on your dream.” Anna says, sounding both apologetic and happy.

Ruby stands up and holds her hands out, and Anna takes them with a big smile.  Ruby answers with her own smile in return, “No, it’s alright, I’m just glad to see you.  Are you okay?”

“I am now.  Getting my grace back was kind of traumatic as you could probably guess.  There was an adjustment period.  Are you okay?  Sam and Dean still on track with stopping everything?”

With a shrug Ruby answers, “I’m okay, I’ve missed you though.  Sam and Dean are, well they’re Sam and Dean.  Still fighting a lot, you and I, well we kind of messed them up a little, upset their balance you know?”

“Yeah, I’ve heard more about them from the other angels now.  Seems the whole soul-mate thing they’ve got going on is a get-out-of-Hell-free-card.  Who knew there were exceptions like that?”

“Huh, guess the rules are slippery when you need something done.” Ruby says, and doesn’t elaborate further.

Anna tilts her head in question, “Do you mean the Winchesters are working for Heaven?”

“Something like that, it’s somewhat more complicated, a lot of behind-the-scenes stuff, that you missed while you were human, I’m sure you’ll get caught up.” Ruby says reassuringly, pulling Anna in closer, their bodies almost touching.

“But I’m cut off from the Hierarchy, there’s no information coming from the higher ups anymore.  Just a lot of lower level angels talking to each other.”
“You’re not back in the in-crowd yet huh?” Ruby kids, running her hands up and down Anna’s back.

“No, definitely not, doubt I ever will be again.  But I don’t think Heaven would be using the Winchesters for something wrong, is that what you’re saying?”  Anna can sense there is something that Ruby is not telling her, but in the dream state she can’t read her completely.

“I don’t know about all that angel politics stuff, but if it’s as messed up as the demons are, Sam and Dean don’t have anything to worry about.”  Ruby says, hoping her lie will not be too obvious.

Anna can tell that Ruby is not being truthful, she can feel the lie under the surface in Ruby’s body, but doesn’t pursue the issue.  “Are you still helping Sam, like you said you were before?”

Ruby goes still under Anna’s hands, wary, trying to hide her fear, and it’s hard, because this is her dream and she’s so open here.  It’s almost unfair.  She doesn’t want to lie again to her friend, but she has to, everything depends on it, The Plan is so very close to being completed.  So Ruby pulls herself together and gets ready to sell the biggest whopper yet, “Yes, Sam still needs my help now and then.  Dean still doesn’t like it.  But you know how jealous he gets.”

Anna is disarmed for a moment from this obvious lie by the memory of Sam and Dean’s jealous fighting, “Yes I remember, Sam being a, what was it Dean called him? Oh yes, a jealous bitch.”  They both laugh a little thinking of those two men, unhinged at these two powerful beings coming between them momentarily when both Heaven and Hell knows they’re forever joined.

“So, I’m sorry that I can’t be with you again, in person.  I really wanted to, after that one time, you were all I could think about.  But I tried, a few times the past couple of days.  And I couldn’t get close anymore.  Maybe it’s controlling my grace again after so long being human, I don’t know.”

“That was you?  I felt something so strange this week, like a cool lotion was on one side of my skin.  It was weird, I was wondering what it was.  I’m sorry too, you’ve been, well I haven’t stopped thinking about you either.”

“I don’t know what it is about you Ruby, but I wish, I just wish we could be together again.  But it just isn’t going to happen.  The apocalypse and everything is upsetting too much in the ether.  I’m not safe for you to be around.”

“Yeah, I kinda figured that out.  There’s something about you too, and I wish the same thing.  At least we have that one time to remember though, right?”
“Goodbye Ruby, I’ll never forget you.” Anna hugs her closer for a moment and then lightly kisses her cheek.

Ruby turns into the kiss and brushes her lips against Anna’s softly, “Bye Anna, thanks for finding a way to talk to me.  I’ll never forget you.”

Anna turns and walks away, her form slowly disappearing into the mist hovering in the forest.   Ruby wakes up with tears in her eyes, marveling that the angel who touched her so deeply actually found a way to talk to her.  She lies there for a while, remembering being with Anna, her smile, those wide eyes and beautiful red hair, so soft in her hands.  There’s no point in it though, she’ll never have that again.  No touch, no love.  Just following through with The Plan. That’s all she has left.
rubys plan border
After Anna has this dream conversation with Ruby, she becomes suspicious of some of the things she sensed Ruby was trying to hide from her angel senses.  Even though she knows it’s dangerous because she’s being hunted by the angels, she thinks she can trust Castiel.  He’d seemed so close with the Winchesters, and so open to the idea of challenging Heaven’s rules.  It seems like he’s the only option left, taking a chance on contacting him to warn Castiel about Ruby and her dealings with Sam.  She thinks it’s important enough information to risk her own life, because it might be enough to avert the apocalypse that all the angels seem so set on bringing about.

She allows herself to follow Castiel for a while, unseen and watches him let Sam out of the panic room at Bobby Singer’s.  She shadows him to a river side and watches him watch the water. Her senses flare up, because he’s different, not the Castiel from just a week ago.  But maybe it’s still worth a try, he’s been her friend, her subordinate for so very long, maybe she’ll be able to get through to him.  Make him listen.

Anna appears suddenly behind Castiel, and asks sternly, “What did you do?”

He turns to answer his former superior and friend, “You shouldn't have come, Anna.”

Anna demands, “Why did you let out Sam Winchester?”

Castiel answers in an eerie almost robotic voice devoid of the emotion he’d been manifesting not that long ago, “Those were my orders.”

Anna is instantly furious, and so confused.  She had thought Castiel was on the side of the Winchesters, that he’d seen through the useless commands from Heaven by now, “Orders? Cas, you saw him. He's drinking demon blood. It's so much worse than we thought. Dean was trying to stop him.  And I have new information, about the demon Ruby that Sam is working with, her plan Cas, she’s not trying to help him… “

But Castiel doesn’t listen, and instead answers flatly, without any emotion at all, not even the regret he knows he should be feeling, “You really shouldn't have come.”

Two other angels suddenly appear, and Anna disappears into a massive white light.
annas grace border
Ruby misses Anna for a long time after she’s disappeared.  There’s no way to get her back from Heaven’s gulag, and she’s more concerned with The Plan and keeping Sam on track.  But there are nights when she takes time to rest, and remembers back to that one short encounter in the cabin.  When she’d had Anna’s scent all over her hand, and her own scent had covered Anna’s face.  She concentrates on the memory of that beautiful face, the large eyes full of lust and curiosity, open and pure.  There’s been no one else in her long life that had ever looked at her like that.  And somehow, it’s enough.

As she collapses back into Sam’s arms, feeling her life drain away, all Ruby can think about is her triumph, but how empty it is, there’s no one here to celebrate with, no one who gets it, what she’s accomplished here tonight.  If only she could tell Anna, she’d make her understand, then they could go off somewhere together, somewhere an angel and a demon could be, assuming that Lucifer is feeling generous. Ruby pictures herself looking up into Anna’s eyes.  Feeling a peaceful welcome at seeing her beautiful face smiling down at her, accepting her, demonic soul and all.  She falls into Anna’s wide smile in a last perfect kiss before knowing nothing at all.

~FIN~